Is Being Frugal Attractive?

Years and years ago when I had a first date with my husband, I was blown away by how much fun we had and just how little money we spent. First dates are typically a time to wow your new friend with going over the top right?

In a recent poll, 92% said that being frugal was very attractive. Most noted that being the opposite of frugal and not having a good handle on your money was actually a huge red flag. When people are at an age when settling down and having a long-term relationship is important, how you handle money really does matter.

Why is being frugal attractive?

On our first date, my husband took me to a Mexican restaurant for lunch and afterwards we went bowling. That sounds like a pretty bland plan for a first date, but I had so much fun and laughed so much.

We start to expect to be impressed on a first date and we often only put our best side forward on that date. Instead, my husband showed me exactly who he is, and we instantly had a connection that has lasted a long time.

When you see someone who is responsible with their money and how they spend it, it will give you a good idea of your future with them. If you meet someone who spends freely but doesn’t know how they will pay their rent, that can be a big red flag.

After having my own issues with managing my money, it was quite attractive to see someone who managed their money well. He was a huge saver that planned for slow months and always wanted to have his bills paid. This inspired me to be much more aware of my own spending and to start saving more.

Being frugal usually means you have a plan to accomplish both short- and long-term goals. You know what you want to achieve, and you are actively working towards making those goals happen.

As with any goals, it seems to be easier to have some shorter and easier to achieve goals like cash flowing Christmas presents this year or paying off credit card debt. Then pair them up with some longer-term goals like buying a house, paying off an existing mortgage, or building up a retirement account.

Personally, I think having goals means that people have thought hard about what they want and have set plans to help keep them on track. This to me is technically adulting, but it is also taking pride in your life and working to improve your situation.

There is probably never a time in your life that you will not have goals or striving to accomplish something. Do you think Elon Musk has stopped planning and making goals? He has more money than anyone on the planet, but he still shows up to work and continues making plans for his life!

Impressing People with Money

Do you know what you call a person that is continually trying to impress you with their money? They are usually poor or in debt. When you truly care about how others perceive you based on your house, car, clothing, or possessions you become stuck in a vicious cycle.

Once you start trying to show off or keep up with others, it is very hard to get off that road. So many people spend their money just to show people that they have money. That seems backwards, right?

If I have money and I want to keep and grow that money, I probably shouldn’t be spending the money to show other people that I have money. It kind of sounds crazy when you think about it.

Sometimes we need to truly think about ourselves and our family and put them first before we start trying to show off or impress others. Recently a friend told me that she only buys generic label food using online grocery pick up because she was afraid people would see her buying it and think she was poor.

If my friends or acquaintances truly care so much about the label on my food instead of my personality, then I think I may need some new friends. With the cost of food surging right now, I would expect that a lot more people are buying generic due to cost.

Good with money = Good with Life?

When you prepare for things to come you can be ready to face them. It truly is that simple. When we save our money for just in case issues in our emergency fund, then we are actually less likely to have an emergency.

We all know people that seem to float through life with no particular path in mind. They change jobs on a whim, they have huge highs and very low lows. Personally, I can’t handle that kind of rollercoaster ride.

I like the middle of the road; this means I probably won’t be a gazillionaire anytime soon, but this also means that I will probably always have a roof over my head.

Being frugal and planning for expenses has allowed my family to be prepared for almost anything and also allowed us to splurge when we want to. Being frugal doesn’t necessarily mean living like you are poor, but it does mean living below your means.

In a group I’m involved in, someone recently asked when they can start spending money again. They had almost paid off all their debt, had a good emergency fund of $2000, and she was itching to go on a shopping spree.

Being frugal isn’t a temporary solution to financial problem. It is truly a lifestyle that is full of choices. Yes, we can mimic being frugal for a short period of time in order to pay off debt and put ourselves in a better situation, but unless you are in for the long haul you may be surprised at the results.

Did you know that every year, people race to pay off their debt and then wind up back in debt again within a few years? By looking at being frugal as a long-term plan, you can prevent this debt from happening again and again.

If you want to go on a spending spree after not spending money for a good amount of time, that is fine. We just encourage you to plan and save for it. So, for instance, you want to buy a whole new wardrobe. Then you need to estimate how much you will need to spend, save up for it, and then make sure you don’t overspend your budgeted amount.

Being frugal doesn’t mean you won’t spend money ever again; it just means you will be more intentional with your money when you spend it. For more information on being frugal, check out “Can you be Frugal and Generous?“.